Those Shoes Rule, Those Shoes Suck.

I can’t stand most chick flicks. Ok wait. Let me rephrase. I can’t stand watching most chick flicks with other people. Especially boys. I have this reputation you see. I have tattoos, so ergo must be a cool tom boy that chills, drinks beer, smokes cigarettes and watches sports. Little do boys know I do only one of those things, but I outwardly attempt to put off the vibe that I do it all. That’s what makes me awesome.

I recently partook in a drive in theatre experience. I bought my dream car recently, a wood panelled station wagon that has the reverse bucket seat in the back that is just perfect for the drive in. So we went. Tuesday’s is only a double feature, instead of a triple for only $5 and I was unemployed, broke and bored, so this kind of night fit perfectly within not only my budget but my mental stability. The two movies were Sex and the City 2 and Robin Hood. Let my rant begin.

Sex and the City 2 is possibly the biggest waste of time on the entire planet. This comes above medial tasks like filing, and board meetings, and for those of you that are younger, homework. Seriously can’t stand that movie. There wasn’t even enough clothes and shoes to keep me entertained, and that’s saying something. The part I’d like to focus on though is near the end.. let me see if I can find a clip. While you wait, here’s a funny monkey:

I make that face all the time

I make that face all the time

Ok… Screw American piracy laws.

Besides the ridiculous story line that legitimately makes no gosh darn sense, there’s unfathomable lifestyles portrayed for someone who thinks owning a house at 26 is a great accomplishment. Not compared to this woman who has 2 apartments, one that boasts a walk-in closet that actually made me gasp, full of clothes that I can only look at in magazines. Not only will I never be able to afford these clothes, or apartments, I probably wouldn’t even be allowed in a store that sells such merchandise.

This makes me more angry than you will ever know... blasphemy!

This makes me more angry than you will ever know… blasphemy!

What I’m really trying to get down to, but can’t because there’s so much more that I hated, yes, hated about this movie was the end when the 4 girls get chased through the city by the men and hidden into a room by woman dressed in burkas. These women then took their burkas off to show designer clothing underneath of the most expensive taste. This had absolutely had no friggin’ point for the movie whatsoever. None. Zilch. Nada. F-IN NOTHING! All it did was take a piece of an entire religion, stomp on it, dig their heels in it, burn it and then take the ashes and mix it with turpentine to further the assault. COME ON HOLLYWOOD! (yes. I’m yelling. You should see me in person rant such things. It’s either hilarious or scary)

How can an entire group of writers, producers and directors assume women of muslim faith aren’t happy the way they are? Seriously. I was utterly shocked to learn that of all the 47 countries where the Muslim religion faith is practiced, many of those woman don’t agree with some of it’s practices. And that may be true, but not because of realistic issues, but because there’s not enough “colour” in their wardrobe; or there isn’t Prada marked across their linen clothes. Give me a fucking break. You failed Sex and the City 2.. Failed. How dare you assume anything about anything. You have no right, and it made me really really really really mad.

I can’t continue. I’m too pissed off. Thanks a lot.

P.S. Robin Hood wasn’t any better.


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